Cause/Effect

If there was one thing that I could teach my children and their friends, I think it would be the inevitability of cause and effect: the fact that, in certain situations, A is always followed by B. If you drop a bowling ball on your foot, it is going to hurt—always. This isn’t because the bowling ball hates you, and it isn’t because your foot didn’t get the same chances that other feet got: it is because mass equals force times acceleration. Unfortunately, most of the cause and effect scenarios I would like to teach them are not as easily demonstrated as a physics experiment—although even the most doubting among them could not failed to be swayed by my bowling ball argument, provided I have both the bowling ball and their foot, the same cannot be said of cause and effect scenarios like Not Paying Your Rent Leads to Eviction. Although they nod their heads most emphatically both when I tell them that this, indeed, will be the case, and when I explain to them that it will not be because the landlord hates them, or because the Universe is out to get to get them, but because housing equals rent times on time payment, I can still sense that they don’t fully grasp the concept. Not completely. Which is why I was so glad to recently discover something new on Facebook: the timeline.

I know that timeline is reviled by many in the Facebook world, and, in general, I am willing to go along with the reviling, since in principal I am against any type of change, especially change that involves me actually having to do something. (Yes, clicking a button counts as doing something.) But that was before I realized the true function of the timeline, which is, as far as I can tell, to demonstrate most aptly the forces of cause and effect.

Consider, for example, the timeline I saw recently. Although this particular timeline’s owner wasn’t old enough yet to have many years worth of life events stacked up, that didn’t stop him from having some pretty major ones crammed into the timeline he did have. And it didn’t stop his timeline from being a perfect example of cause and effect.

First there was the cause. Numerous posts said such things as “I am SO wasted,” “That party was sick,” and, “Legalize weed.” Other people added comments such as, “Why were the cops at your place again last night?” “Do you have my shoes?” and, “Dude—you are SO wasted.”

Next came the effect. Interspersed with the “party on” posts there began to be posts such as “Does anyone know where I can get a job?” “Why won’t anyone call me back?” and the ever popular “FML.” Soon the posts about looking for a job became more frequent (as well as much, much bleaker), and eventually were replaced with posts such as “Looks like I’m about to be homeless,” “Why can’t I ever catch a break?” and “I hate everything.”

As the tone of the posts changed, so, too, did the amount of “likes” and comments from Facebook friends, until by the end of the month each comment was met by a resounding silence from the cyber world. And then, finally, the posts stopped completely, leading me to assume that homelessness doesn’t come with DSL. Or at least it didn’t in this particular case.

To me, this was a succinct example of cause and effect, so much so that I was (and still am) tempted to print out this timeline and hang it up on my fridge as a warning to all the teenagers that inhabit my house.

Or better yet, maybe I’ll just attach it to the next bowling ball I drop on their feet.

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